Chris Rock Shoots, Scores

The best part about the Rockets/Lakers game going seven games: I will not be able to watch it and can therefore not be blamed for a loss.

A Lakers loss is a scary thought. Think about the current status of sports in Los Angeles:

• Manny suspended 50 games for performance enhancers.
• NHL playoffs continue without the Kings, who ended the season in second to last place in the Western Conference.
• Mark Sanchez, beloved USC quarterback, opted for the draft.
• UCLA Bruins were ousted in the second round of the NCAA tournament.
• Everyone on the L.A. Galaxy MLS team died of swine flu.
• The L.A. Avengers have yet to win the coveted Arena Bowl championship.
  

If the Lakers don't figure out a way to control Aaron Brooks (Chris Rock) and win game 7, you can bet we'll be sewing all these flags together to form a noose.

Ariza, now is your time to shine.